


Spindrift

by Polomonkey



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Art, Captivity, Fish out of Water, Fluff, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mermaids, Mythical Beings & Creatures, Oblivious Merlin (Merlin), Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-03
Updated: 2020-07-26
Packaged: 2021-03-01 19:15:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 18,993
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23812189
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Polomonkey/pseuds/Polomonkey
Summary: After saving Arthur's life, merman Merlin finds himself banished from the sea. Moving in with Arthur seems to be the only option - after all, how hard can life on land be?Harder than expected as it turns out, especially when Merlin's secret is discovered by the wrong people...
Relationships: Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)
Comments: 123
Kudos: 387





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [LFB72](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LFB72/gifts).
  * Inspired by [Art: To Become A Single Ocean (Merlin Reverse 2019)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/18975604) by [LFB72](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LFB72/pseuds/LFB72). 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> LFB, this is a very belated birthday present for your lovely self! I know your [mermaid art](https://archiveofourown.org/works/18975604) is open to writers (and remixers!) and it deserves so many different stories in my eyes, so here is one of them. Thank you for the beautiful inspiration and for being such a brilliant artist and wonderful friend!
> 
> All credit to Clea for suggesting this as a gift idea :)
> 
> Now with art embedded courtesy of the lovely LFB!

[ ](https://imgur.com/yEGObGi)

The sea was calm.

Normally Merlin liked it that way, liked to be able to swim below the water and look up at the rippled gold of the sun, to feel its warmth on his face when he finally broke the surface.

But today he wanted turbulence. It was hard to drown a man in calm waters.

He looked again at the little boat in the distance, at the man leaning over the prow. From here he was just a blond blur but Merlin knew his face intimately. Knew his name, knew his job, where he lived, what his father did for a living. Most importantly, Merlin knew that the man was out looking for merfolk.

And for that he had to die.

It hadn’t been Merlin’s idea. He understood the decisions Sophia had to make as their leader, understood the peril they would be in if humans discovered their existence. But he had been the one to speak against her proclamation. To suggest that warning the man away might be equally as effective.

The council had been displeased by his vocal dissent. Perhaps that was why he had been selected to carry out the sentence.

Merlin swam a little closer to the boat, dipping back underwater to remain unseen. He didn’t want to do this. But Sophia and the council were right. The man was too much of a threat to live. Whatever his intentions were - and for all the research the council had conducted, they still didn’t know - he had already come too close to finding them. And his persistence only seemed to grow with each passing day. Merlin had to put aside his distaste and do what was best for his kin.

He re-emerged a few meters away, barely breaking the surface. The man was facing the other way, sunlight glinting off the camera in his hand. The lightest of breezes was ruffling his hair and he looked somehow younger than he had when Merlin saw him last.

Merlin’s stomach roiled.

_He’s a threat to us all._

He closed in on the boat. They were far from shore, no other ships in sight. If anyone noticed the drowning man, they would be too late to reach him.

He swam below the boat, contemplated the structure above him. It was a simple motorboat, solidly made but clearly advanced in years. Merlin might not be as strong as some of his cousins but he could certainly put a hole in it that would bring the whole thing down. Then maybe the man would just go down with it, and he wouldn’t have to do anything more…

It was unlikely. They’d done research enough on the man. He was born in Chaxley, he’d been swimming in this sea all his life. Even this far out, he’d be able to make it back to shore.

Merlin would have to… would have to…

He couldn’t think about it anymore. Gritting his teeth, Merlin flipped his tail and propelled himself up out of the water. He only had time to register the shock in the man’s eyes as he whipped around, and then Merlin pulled down hard on the side of the boat.

It capsized in an instant. The man hit the water, his camera slipping from his hands and sinking beneath the waves. He went under, and Merlin dared to hope that the shock might have got to him, but he surfaced again seconds later, coughing and spluttering.

“You… you…”

He didn’t seem afraid, which struck Merlin as all wrong. He seemed almost… happy.

“I knew it!”

The man shook his head, drops of water flying everywhere.

“I knew you were real!”

_Idiot._

The man was about to die and he was congratulating himself on guessing the existence of merfolk.

Not that he knew he was about to die.

Merlin steeled himself. He was much, much stronger than any human. It was going to be a matter of little effort to hold the man under the waves until he stopped moving.

“I-I need to take a picture,” the man was babbling. “To take a - oh, my camera. Oh well. I don’t need that, I can - I can see you in the flesh!”

The man was smiling. He didn’t seem to care that he was wet, or his boat was ruined, or his camera was plummeting towards the depths of the ocean. He was grinning all over his face.

Merlin willed himself to swim forward. He didn’t move.

“I’m sorry, I’m- I’m flustered, I’m sorry. I’m just so…!”

Incongruously, ridiculously, the man held out his hand, as though he expected Merlin to shake it.

He must have seen the look on Merlin’s face because he withdrew it, his grin fading.

“Look, I’m not here to cause any trouble. I know how it’s been in the past, and I’m not part of any of that. I don’t want to haul any of you off to an exhibition or try and trick you. I mean you no harm.”

His tone was earnest, sincere.

“I just… I have a few questions. That I need answers to. And I didn’t know how else to-”

It might have been the shock of seeing Merlin’s tail break the surface as he prepared to swim forwards, or perhaps the man read something in Merlin’s eyes. But as Merlin finally made a move forward, the man jerked back. And hit his head on the side of the boat.

It was shocking, how quickly he slid under the surface. And then again, not shocking at all, because the sea was Merlin’s home and he’d seen this before, seen countless sailors and smugglers and even holiday-makers slip under the water, and there was nothing different about this, nothing at all…

This was exactly what he wanted to happen, and he hadn’t had to lift a finger. This was what had to happen. The man had to die.

Arthur Pendragon had to die. Arthur, who’d lived in Chaxley all his life. Arthur with the rich father. Arthur with the fancy camera. Arthur who’d been boating closer and closer to them for months, who’d been spying on them, watching them, lying in wait for them…

Arthur who said he wasn’t here to cause any harm. Arthur who just wanted answers. Arthur who’d held out his hand to a merman who’d just capsized his boat.

Merlin was diving underwater before he even knew what he was doing. It was of no physical consequence to wrap his arms around Arthur’s waist and pull him up to the surface. But his head was spinning and his heartbeat was a steady thrum of _danger danger_ and he knew exactly what the other consequences for this were going to be.

But he’d made his choice. He swam Arthur to some rocks a few meters away, laid him out on his back. Then he pounded the fragile human chest and breathed air into the frail human lungs until Arthur stirred, choking and retching and painfully alive.

Merlin watched him revive, suddenly inexplicably drained. He hadn’t long now.

“You saved me,” Arthur gasped out at last, voice raspy and weak.

“I was trying to kill you,” Merlin said tiredly and Arthur’s face lost what little colour it had.

“Why would you-”

“These rocks are a base for a fishing crew, there are flares buried in a rescue pack in the sand over there,” Merlin said rapidly, because someone would be coming soon, his kin didn’t miss a trick in the ocean. “Use a flare to attract a rescue boat. Do not get back in the water under any circumstances, at least not round here. They’ll send someone else now I’ve failed.”

“But I-”

“Do it,” Merlin hissed and Arthur began to sit up, panic in his eyes.

“Where are you going?”

Merlin didn’t answer.

The truth was he didn’t know.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Content warning for a brief reference to suicide and some discussion of grief

It could have been a lot worse. Fatal, in fact, which is what Merlin had expected. Sophia had no reason to show lenience. Arthur Pendragon was the closest they’d come to a threat in years and Merlin had failed to eliminate him.

But show lenience she did. Of a sort. He was banished from the ocean forever.

It was not a death sentence but it felt like one. All merfolk had the ability to shift shape and walk on land as humans did, but they rarely used it. Why would they? Life in the ocean was vastly preferable. They lost a good portion of their strength while up on land, as well as their ability to move with great speed, and of course walking took much more effort than swimming. Trips to land were usually to undertake some kind of mission, like the research Sophia had ordered they carry out on Arthur when he first started hunting them.

Merlin hadn’t been chosen to conduct that research but Freya had come on land to talk to locals and find out what she could. Plenty of townspeople had been willing to gossip about rich old Uther Pendragon, with his poor dead wife, and his quiet, reserved son. But no one had provided a single clue as to why that quiet son might want to hunt for merfolk.

Merlin didn’t know any more than what he’d heard from the man himself that fateful day: that Arthur wanted answers. They could be the kind of answers that would have threatened Merlin’s kind but somehow he didn’t think so. There had been something earnest about Arthur, something Merlin couldn’t quite put his finger on. His instinct was that Arthur was no threat.

Then again, where had his instinct gotten him? Cold and alone and wandering the streets of Chaxley in the middle of a rain storm. He’d managed to steal some clothes from tourists at the beach, but he had nothing else on him. No food and no way of procuring it, no money - the grease that seemed to spin all the wheels in the human world - and worst of all, no shelter. The cold felt different in his human form. It seemed to seep right into his bones.

Merlin tried to sort priorities in his head. Shelter first, food later. Then he’d figure out the money problem. He stopped walking and looked around at the street he found himself on. He was in the south part of the town, where most of the housing was. It would be better to turn back to the north where the shops were, he might be able to find a late opening cafe to sit inside and plan.

But as he turned to go back the way he’d come, something tugged at him.

He could smell something. Something familiar, something redolent with meaning. Something… something…

Someone. Arthur Pendragon. He was nearby.

Merlin followed the smell a few streets down, then turned left and left again. There was a row of three small houses and he walked towards the third as if in a trance. Arthur lived here, he was sure of it.

But then, what of that? They were enemies. Merlin had tried to kill him.

But then Merlin had saved him. Arthur owed him for that, especially considering what it had cost him.

He had no one else. Instinct had told him already that Arthur was a good human. What choice did he have?

He approached the door and studied it a moment. The place seemed surprisingly modest considering what Merlin knew of the Pendragon fortune, but perhaps Arthur was lying low after his brush with mer-vengeance. Very wise.

Merlin took a second to imagine how he might be received and then decided that was a waste of time. Better to knock first and think later.

The look on Arthur’s face when he answered the door was something of a revelation. Merlin hadn’t known human faces could be that expressive.

“Hello. I’m Merlin. You might remember me from the ocean.”

Arthur’s mouth was wide open enough to store a dinghy.

“You… you…”

“Merlin,” Merlin prompted helpfully, wondering if Arthur perhaps wasn’t the brightest shell on the seashore.

Arthur gaze swept down his body and made a sudden dramatic stop.

“You… you have legs.”

“So do you,” Merlin said crossly because it was rude to stare.

“But I never had a tail!” Arthur said, rather stupidly in Merlin’s opinion.

“Yeah, well, too bad for you. Tails are much better than legs.”

Merlin was aware he sounded bitter, but so what? Being human was terrible compared to being a merman! They moved so slowly, everything was so loud, and he’d never been more aware of how heavy his head was. How did they cope just balancing these things on their necks all day?

“How did you find me?” Arthur demanded, cutting through his mournful reverie.

Merlin decided not to mention that he’d sniffed Arthur out, the prat would probably take offence.

“I have my ways,” he said vaguely.

“And _why_ did you find me?”

That one was harder to answer.

“You know how I rescued you from drowning?” Merlin said, hoping to remind Arthur of his recent beneficence.

“The drowning that you caused by capsizing my boat? Yes, I do,” Arthur said, folding his arms across his chest.

_Damn._

“Anyway,” Merlin said, valiantly regrouping. “My people weren’t exactly happy that I let you live. So they sort of… banished me.”

“Banished you?”

“To land,” Merlin said. “Hence the legs.”

Arthur looked a bit disturbed.

“They can do that? Banish you to land?”

“Well, they can more promise to slaughter me if I ever set foot in the ocean again, which is kind of the same thing.”

Arthur looked a bit sick. Humans could be queasy about such things, Merlin knew from what his mother had told him. Which was rich considering all the wars humans had started. But the strictures of mer-life always appeared harsh to them.

For Merlin, it was just the way he had been raised. He’d known the consequences for doing what he did. He was lucky they hadn’t killed him there and then.

He wasn’t quite hardened enough for that thought not to make him shiver so he stepped forward, focusing on Arthur again.

“So that’s the whole sorry tale. Can you let me in, please?” Merlin said.

“Let you in?” Arthur said, taking an almost comical step back. “Why?”

“Because I’m staying with you,” Merlin said, resisting the urge to add obviously. Humans could be very slow at times.

“Why on earth would you be staying with me?” Arthur said, looking aghast.

“I have nowhere else to go,” Merlin said.

“How is that my problem?”

“I saved your life!”

“You sunk my boat!”

“You threatened my kin!”

“You - you drowned my camera!”

From the look on Arthur’s face, he could tell he’d lost that exchange. But his chin was still raised stubbornly.

“You can’t stay here, I’m sorry. There’s barely enough room for me and I can’t take on another mouth to feed.”

“With all your father’s money?” Merlin said incredulously.

Arthur’s face went very still.

“He disowned me. After the boat incident. So there is no money.”

Merlin was somewhat wrongfooted, by both the revelation and what was clearly no small amount of pain in Arthur’s eyes. There was an awkward silence.

“I don’t take up much room,” he offered weakly and Arthur sighed.

“Merlin…”

“You think this is easy for me?” Merlin said, voice strained. “You think I like being forced to rely on you? I don’t know any humans, Arthur. You’re it. You’re the grand total of my human acquaintances. I was disowned too. I lost my home and my friends and now I don’t have anywhere to live and it’s getting dark and I know it’s not ideal but just please, please can I-”

He broke off, mortified to find his eyes were filling up. It was the effect of this shapeshift, he’d never be so emotional in his real form.

Humans were vulnerable things, it seemed.

He was aware that Arthur was staring and he brushed at his eyes, turning to leave. This had been a horrible mistake. As if the world agreed with him, a clap of thunder rang out, and rain began sheeting down harder than before.

“Oh for God’s sake.”

Merlin turned back, to find Arthur shaking his head in disbelief.

“Just get inside, you idiot, it’s freezing.”

“Really?”

“One night,” Arthur said, holding up a warning finger. “That’s all.”

Perhaps prat had been too strong a word. Arthur wasn’t such a bad human after all.

“One night,” Merlin promised as he stepped inside the flat. “So… do you have any fish?”

Arthur rolled his eyes.

“I’ll check the cupboard.”

Merlin gave him his most winning smile, the one that had made all the little mermaids blush in their shoals.

“Much appreciated,” he said magnanimously. “I’m very glad I sniffed you out.”

“You did what?!”

One night proved to be something of an underestimate. Merlin had nowhere else to go after all and no money to rent a room or a flat. Arthur seemed to reluctantly concede that they were stuck together for a while, however inconvenient it might be. He agreed to let Merlin stay until he had found his feet (somewhat literally in Merlin’s case) but it was clear he wasn’t entirely thrilled about the arrangement.

Space was the first issue. Arthur’s house was just a two up, two down - a bathroom and a combined kitchen/living room downstairs, then two bedrooms upstairs. Except one was less a bedroom than a box room, with just about enough space to fit a blow up bed that Arthur had hastily procured from somewhere. Merlin didn’t mind that at all - to be honest it was unnatural to lie down in a bed to sleep anyway, given that in the ocean they just slept while drifting on the current. But his human form got tired much more easily and the blow up bed provided a perfectly satisfactory solution. He had suggested on the first night that he simply share Arthur’s double bed to save the hassle of blowing the other one up, but Arthur had become rather spluttery at that suggestion.

Not as spluttery as he had become when Merlin had barged into his room the first morning there and demanded to know why Arthur had been hunting his people.

“I wouldn’t be in this mess if it wasn’t for you so I hope you have a bloody great reason!”

Arthur sat up in bed, blinking sleep out of his eyes and looking entirely confused.

“What the- Merlin, it’s five am!”

“A-m?” Merlin repeated. “I have no idea what that means and I won’t respond to it.”

“It _means_ that it’s very early.”

“The sun’s up,” Merlin said, waving a dismissive hand. “Sun’s up, you should be up. Now answer my question.”

“Can I at least have a coffee first?”

“No! Why were you hunting us?”

Arthur sat up to look at him and that’s when the spluttering began.

“What are you wearing? Where are the pyjamas I lent you?”

“They were too constricting so I put this on from the kitchen.”

“An apron?”

“If that’s what it’s called,” Merlin said. It wasn’t a bad fit, if he did say so himself.

“Are you wearing underwear?!”

“No,” Merlin said, confused by the question. “It’s nice to feel the air on my-”

“Thank you!” Arthur interrupted with a squeak. “You know what, that’s fine. Keep the apron and come back at a more reasonable hour.”

“No,” Merlin said firmly. “I need an explanation. You owe me that. For all I know you could be in the mythical creatures trade and you’re planning to taser and tag me as soon as you get the chance.”

Arthur sighed heavily.

“I wouldn’t… alright. Let’s talk. _After_ you put the pyjamas on. And _after_ I make us some coffee.”

Which was all well and good in theory but in practice Merlin thought it tasted like sour barnacle juice.

“I’ll make you a tea,” Arthur said, with a somewhat long-suffering air. But the tea did turn out to be much more palatable, even if it wasn’t enough to distract Merlin from the issue at hand.

“Speak,” he directed when Arthur had drained his cup. “Whatever it is, I’ll have heard it all before. We’ve had marine biologists, we’ve had creature hunters, we’ve had professors and scientists and even one incredibly confused man who sailed off course looking for Nessie.”

He levelled Arthur with a hard stare.

“You’re not special. You just got closer than most. So out with it.”

Arthur took a long sip of coffee, as if he was fortifying himself.

“Well, I’m not any of those things. I wasn’t looking to expose you all or capture you or even profit from you. I just wanted-”

“Answers,” Merlin said, remembering. “Answers about what?”

Arthur took a deep breath.

“My mother drowned when I was nine years old,” he said in a rush. “She went out alone on a boat in the sea here and fell into the water.”

Merlin bowed his head. He had seen the grief in humans when they lost one of their own this way, and he had always pitied it.

“They never found her body and I… my great uncle told me about merfolk. He’d done studies of his own in the past, though he concluded it was best to leave well alone. He said it was possible that- that…”

“That we save some from drowning by turning them into one of us,” Merlin finished.

The look in Arthur’s eyes, so hopeful, so eager, almost broke Merlin’s heart.

“It’s true that we can,” Merlin said gently. “But only for those who choose to drown themselves. In the old lore of our kind, that means they’ve chosen the sea and so we help them become part of it.”

“Yes, my uncle told me that too,” Arthur said. “I thought… I thought maybe…”

“You thought she drowned herself.”

The words hung heavy between them and Merlin felt a quite uncustomary sadness building in him. As a merman he might have pitied Arthur; in human guise, he felt a much deeper sorrow.

“We haven’t turned anyone these last thirty years, Arthur,” Merlin said quietly. “I’m sorry.”

Arthur’s face had gone very white but he managed a kind of nod.

“I suppose,” he said at last. “I suppose I’m glad in a way. I wanted her to still be living somewhere… but it was hard to bear the fact that she’d chosen to leave us. Leave me.”

“It sounds like she didn’t choose.”

Arthur got up then, abruptly, and went upstairs. He didn’t return for some time, and when he did his eyes were red.

“Sorry,” Merlin said softly, feeling useless.

“It’s alright, honestly, it’s… what’s that smell?”

“I tried to make you coffee but I might have just burned the pot,” Merlin said guiltily and was relieved when Arthur raised a smile.

He put on toast instead and they sat on the couch and talked about his mother, as though they weren’t perfect strangers only a day before.

“She was lovely,” Arthur said wistfully. “She’d make everything an adventure, even just a trip to the shop. When I was little she’d make up all these stories to tell me at night, with all these different voices and little bits of costume she’d made.”

He let out a little sigh.

“I never understood what she saw in my father. He hardly ever even smiles.”

Merlin cringed a little, remembering what Arthur had said the day before, and Arthur noticed.

“Yes, he isn’t speaking to me since the boat was wrecked. Said it was time I grew up and sorted my life out, and he was officially cutting me off. I think he’d forgotten that I’ve been making my own money for years.”

“What did you say to him?”

“It involved judicious use of the f word,” Arthur said wryly.

“Fish?” Merlin said, partly just to make Arthur laugh. And then, because he was feeling a little guilty still: “Sorry about the boat.”

“We barely speak anyway, I’m not sure how much difference this’ll make,” Arthur said. “As for the boat, it wasn’t exactly in prime condition. Though it was rather impressive how you capsized it.”

Merlin preened a little.

“Mer-strength.”

“I’m guessing you’ve lost that now?”

“Yeah, most of it,” Merlin said glumly.

“Most of it?”

Merlin contemplated briefly and then stood and lifted the sofa. With Arthur sat on it.

“Oh my God,” Arthur said, looking equal parts awed and petrified.

“I used to be able to lift that above my head,” Merlin said sadly.

“Er, I think that’s quite strong enough for my liking,” Arthur said. “At least you’ll be useful when I need to clean beneath the fridge.”

He regarded Merlin.

“While we’re sharing I, er… I have a few questions. About merfolk. If you don’t mind.”

Merlin rather regretted agreeing after Arthur got out a list as long as his arm, but it wasn’t the worst way to pass a morning. And he couldn’t help but warm to Arthur a little after hearing why he’d hunted them down in the first place. After all the selfish hunters over the years, who’d carelessly put Merlin and his people at great risk, Arthur’s reason wasn’t so bad at all. If he’d had to be banished for a human, at least it was this one.

Not that living with Arthur was all plain sailing, however. They had their disagreements. For example, after so long in the cool depths of the ocean, Merlin found being on land a little stuffy at times. It had been early spring when he first arrived on that rainy and frigid day, but summer was definitely approaching and he could feel the heat to come. Fortunately, there was an obvious solution to this: stop wearing clothes. Or perhaps it was only obvious to Merlin because Arthur seemed totally flabbergasted when he first tried it out.

“Woah!” he said, turning to look at the floor as Merlin sauntered into the kitchen for breakfast, enjoying the early morning breeze on his naked skin. “Did you forget something?”

“No?”

“Clothes, Merlin! People wear clothes!”

“I’m not a people,” Merlin said, unruffled, reaching for the Frosties. He had really developed a taste for sugary cereals when fish was unavailable, although Frosties were definitely inferior to Coco Pops...

“Well merfolk stuck on land wear them too!”

“It’s too warm for clothes. Tea?”

“Merlin! Look, you… no one walks around naked, alright?”

“Why not?” Merlin said, fiddling with the kettle.

“It’s… well, it’s not hygienic for one thing.”

Merlin turned around, somewhat offended.

“I’m very hygienic! I was taking three showers a day before you lectured me about the water bill!”

“You weren’t doing that for hygiene, you were enjoying splashing round in the water,” Arthur said rudely, and unfortunately for Merlin, accurately.

“Oh yes, mock the merman for missing the water he’s been _banished_ from-”

“Oh, don’t start. And go and put something on.”

Arthur was very determinedly not looking in Merlin’s direction. It was quite funny. Merlin had to admit that human genitals still looked distinctly odd to him but Arthur was acting like one glimpse of Merlin’s would burn his eyes out.

“What is this about? Is this some kind of human hangup? I haven’t seen you naked since I started living here, come to think of it.”

“I should think not!” Arthur said, sounding comically shocked.

“Why not?” Merlin said, confused. “Are you shy? You seem to have a very nice body by human standards.”

To his surprise, Arthur turned red. Perhaps he was annoyed about the ‘by human standards’ comment. But really without a tail, Merlin couldn’t exactly judge him on the full spectrum of mer-beauty.

“That’s… well, I mean, that is neither here nor there...”

He was getting all flustered. Merlin didn’t always read human emotions correctly but this one was surely anger. He decided to keep the peace for once and went back into the bedroom, returning in a suitable cover up.

“Is that my dressing gown?”

“Yes,” Merlin said, digging into his Frosties. “I like it, it smells like you.”

Arthur got even redder for some reason. Humans were odd.

Beyond dressing gowns, there were larger practicalities to sort out. Arthur had to call in several favours to procure an ID and National Insurance number for Merlin - something he insisted Merlin couldn’t be on land without. Merlin quite liked getting his photo taken for the ID but he was a bit appalled at the glum face staring back at him from the card.

“Why did you send in this one? I look like I’m half-dead!”

“Yes well, welcome to the human world,” Arthur said, slamming yet another form down in front of him. “Sign here, please.”

Other than the mysterious and seemingly sinister council tax that Arthur kept referring to, the main purpose of the various IDs seemed to be so Merlin could get a job and pay his way around the house. Something which he was not entirely keen on doing. Jobs weren’t really a thing in the sea and what Arthur had explained to him about the world of work didn’t seem particularly exciting.

“So you serve people food all day? But you don’t get to eat any of it yourself?”

“We get free coffee,” Arthur said, sounding somewhat defensive.

“I’d just eat what I wanted off the plates,” Merlin said, stretching out languidly. “Why should I have to give it to other people?”

“Because they’re paying for it, Merlin!”

“Anyway, why is it called being a waiter? I don’t like waiting. I’m impatient.”

“Fine,” Arthur said wearily. “I will cross waiter off the list but you need to find something. Something that plays to your skills and strengths.”

“What are my strengths?” Merlin mused aloud.

“Annoying me,” Arthur muttered.

“I heard that,” Merlin said with a glare. “Hearing is actually one of my strengths.”

“A call centre maybe, then?” Arthur said hopefully but Merlin just waved his hand. He’d get a job eventually. He was still finding his feet on land, after all.

But a week later Arthur came home to find Merlin watching the Corrie omnibus on ITV and munching away on the spoils of his latest shopping trip.

“Did you get the bread and cereal like I asked?”

“Oh… I forgot the bread. But I got plenty of seafood!” Merlin said happily, gesturing to the plate in his lap.

“You got sea bream? We can’t afford bream!”

“Alice gave me a discount,” Merlin said, mouth full of delicious fish.

“Merlin! I can barely keep the lights on!”

Arthur glowered furiously, before stamping over to pick a newspaper off the sideboard, which he then opened and unceremoniously slammed down on Merlin’s lap.

“The Chaxley Herald jobs page. Pick one, apply, and then pay for your own bloody fish!”

Merlin looked down at the page.

“Arthur, I can’t.”

“Don’t give me that, you’re eating me out of house and home!”

“No, I mean I can’t-”

“Oh you _can_ Merlin, even if I have to sign you up as a burlesque act at that seedy little pub on the waterfront-”

“Arthur! Listen to me! I can’t pick one because I can’t read!”

Arthur looked almost comically shocked.

“You can’t read?”

“Of course not,” Merlin said irritably. “Or write. Why would we need to do that underwater?”

“But you speak perfect English…”

“Most merfolk in these waters have a least a bit of English. My parents happened to be very keen I learn it, so I’m better than most. But none of us can read or write it.”

Arthur sat down next to him on the couch.

“Merlin I’m… I’m so sorry. I had no idea. And it’s nothing to be ashamed of…”

Merlin wrinkled his nose.

“Well obviously it’s nothing to be ashamed of. Why would I learn a skill I had no use for?”

“No but… well. I didn’t mean to push. Let’s just forget about this job stuff for now.”

Arthur’s expression had gentled, he looked almost guilty for bringing the whole thing up. Merlin’s innate laziness fought with his conscience, and his conscience just about prevailed.

“No, you were right,” he sighed. “I do need to get a job. Why don’t you read these out to me and we’ll see what’s what?”

Arthur still looked troubled.

“Are you sure?”

“I owe you,” Merlin said. “And I like living here.”

Arthur’s smile was suddenly luminous. But his face fell again as he looked down at the newspaper.

“I think you’ll probably need to know how to read and write a bit for most jobs.”

“So you’ll teach me,” Merlin said, unruffled.

“Now, wait a minute-” Arthur said, holding his hands up.

“I’m a fast learner,” Merlin said reassuringly. “It’ll be fun! Sea bream?”

Fun perhaps wasn’t exactly the word but Merlin had to give Arthur credit, he didn’t give up easily. Not even when Merlin was on his tenth rant of the day about the horrors of English spelling.

“Why would there be a b in plumber? Why??”

“Because the Latin for lead was plumbum,” Arthur said wearily.

“What??!”

“Oh for… because I said so, alright? And I don’t know why cough and through are spelt the same but pronounced differently, nor though and bough for that matter, but it’s time to just accept that English makes no sense and move on!”

Merlin did eventually accept that, after many more frustrating days with the dictionary, but the sessions weren’t without their rewards. It was nice to write his name in English, for example, and even nicer to write Arthur’s. Arthur’s name felt smooth coming out his pen somehow, and it looked pretty on the page. He wrote it rather a lot as Arthur encouraged him to leave him notes around the house to practice. He also bought a big pink notebook where he copied down words he liked and tried to write out little sentences with them,

Reading was trickier but Arthur turned on the subtitles for the television so Merlin could learn while getting his daily soap fix; and brought home children’s books from the library for Merlin to sound out. Merlin had grown quite attached to The Very Hungry Caterpillar.

He was a month or so in when they decided he probably had enough literacy skills to pass at a job that didn’t involve much reading or writing. They browsed the paper together, Arthur helping with the longer words, and eventually came across something so suitable that it seemed almost comical.

“I didn’t even know Chaxley had an aquarium,” Merlin said as he nervously straightened his shirt.

“Neither did I, but it’s perfect for you. Now they liked your application so just go in there and be yourself!”

Arthur paused.

“Well, not too much yourself. A sort of toned down version. And for God’s sake don’t eat any of the fish!”

Merlin managed to resist the urge and altogether had quite a pleasant time at his first ever job interview, with a bubbly assistant manager called Gwen. It was the icing on the cake when she called not three hours after to offer him the job.

“You were the best candidate! Well actually you were the only candidate - oh no, I shouldn’t have said that, I’m so sorry! I’m sure you’d have been the best no matter who else showed up! Oh no.”

“It’s fine,” Merlin said. “I’m glad I was the only candidate! Now I’m by default the best.”

“You are!” Gwen said, perking up. “And we’re going to have such fun working together, I just know it!”

Merlin was pleased with himself, though no more pleased than Arthur was. He went out specially to buy calamari for a victory dinner and even opened a bottle of wine he’d been saving (Merlin was still adjusting to alcohol’s effect on him, not that he didn’t enjoy the trial and error of experimenting). He had to admit it felt nice to have made Arthur proud.

The job wasn’t the most interesting thing in the world - mostly cleaning out tanks and stopping little kids from headbutting the glass - but Gwen was lots of fun and it was nice to get out of the flat for a bit. He was less keen on the manager, Cenred, who seemed a bit of a slimeball, but he mostly stayed in his office to avoid working so Merlin didn’t have to interact with him much.

The best and most unexpected bonus of the job came a couple of weeks in. They’d just received a new shipment of tropical fish and Gwen and Cenred had already transferred them into the exhibition tanks. Gwen asked Merlin to go into the back room to check none had been missed and he walked in to find a huge tank of water. Gwen explained to him later it was just used for transferring new stock and went unused most of the time. From that moment on, Merlin bided his time until he was on lock-up duty. Once the building was all closed down for the night, Merlin slipped into the back, shed his clothes, and dived into the blissfully cool water.

For the first time since he had been banished from the ocean, he let himself change forms. His tail seemed to curl out joyfully from under him, as if waking from a long sleep. The gills on his lower fins opened up, breathing the sweetest oxygen he could ever remember tasting.

It wasn’t the same as the sea, not even close, but it was more than he’d had in so long and he welcomed it like an old friend. That first night he was three hours late home because he’d just been floating around the tank, revelling in the feeling of being back in the water.

It became a ritual for him whenever he was on lock-up duty. Arthur fretted of course, that someone might see him, that he might be in danger, but Merlin pointed out that he always locked all the doors and drew the blinds. That Cenred was barely ever there anyway, and Gwen probably wouldn’t mind even if she did see.

Arthur worried anyway but he seemed to understand that Merlin couldn’t give this up. Anyway he was appreciative enough the first time Merlin came home with his pay, freshly withdrawn from his newly opened bank account.

“I’m soooo rich,” Merlin said, fanning himself with notes. “I can’t wait to go down to Alice’s and-”

“Great,” Arthur said, snatching a wad out of Merlin’s hands. “I’ll put this towards your half of the bills.”

“Oi!” Merlin said. He had big, fishcake related plans for that money.

“Don’t worry,” Arthur said, “you’ve still got enough left to buy a dressing gown!”

Grumpily Merlin assented, stopping by the big department store at the centre of town on his way home from work the next day. Only to find Arthur sorely lacking in appreciation at his new cover up.

“Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Er… that’s a kimono, Merlin.”

“So?” Merlin said, looking down at the red, silky, flower patterned gown. He had to admit it was more comfortable than he had anticipated, though not as comfortable as being naked of course.

“Well… they’re usually for women.”

“Pah!” Merlin said, turning back to the television. “You humans and your gender obsessions! The lady in the shop tried to tell me the same thing. And all the pink and purple stuff was on the women’s side, and all the blue and green on the men’s. Load of nonsense.”

He stretched out luxuriously, enjoying the feel of the silk against his skin.

“Anyway my tail’s purple, I suppose you disapprove of that too?”

“I do not disapprove!” Arthur spluttered. “Wear your bloody kimono, I was only letting you know! And your tail colour is…”

He trailed off and Merlin turned back around.

“Is...?” he demanded, somewhat heatedly.

“Beautiful,” Arthur muttered, and Merlin wasn’t sure he’d heard him right.

“Beautiful?”

“Yes well, I barely saw it, and I did have other things on my mind at the time but… well it looked very nice. You looked… nice. I meant, not that I have anything to compare it to. Or that I even know what I’m talking about. Or... well anyway, yes, hmm.”

Merlin was about to thank him for the compliment when Arthur strode off into the kitchen, the back of his ears pink. Very odd.

_Ohhhh. Unless…?_

Merlin cursed himself for being a fool. He knew what was bothering Arthur. He wasn’t _that_ oblivious to human emotions.

At least he knew how to fix this. When Arthur got home the next day, Merlin was waiting to confront him.

“You got all weird yesterday about my tail and, well, it didn’t take a genius to guess why.”

Arthur licked his lips nervously.

“It didn’t? Because Merlin I… I wouldn’t want you to feel...”

“Hold that thought!” Merlin said merrily, digging in his bag. “Here!”

“It’s… a kimono,” Arthur said.

“I do know how to read between the lines, Arthur! You like my tail because it’s purple and you want to wear purple things but weird human society says you shouldn’t because you’re a man!”

Merlin pushed the violet kimono into his hands.

“Well, forget that! Now you can relax in the comfort of your own home in your purple kimono!”

Arthur’s thank you sounded rather strangled, but Merlin assumed he was just choked up with gratitude. It was true that Arthur took a while to get used to wearing it around the house, but Merlin was always happy to remind him to put it on when he forgot.

All in all they’d settled into a nice routine.

But Merlin missed the sea.

Everytime he smelt the salt on the air, everytime he passed the beach, everytime he heard the waves crash against the shore at night, Merlin ached for it. The tank at work wasn’t enough, he wanted the real thing. To be out in open water, to be able to dive down into the deep dark and stretch his fins. And to float lazily beneath the surface, watching the sky above him ripple and shimmer.

It was the kind of longing that wouldn’t go away. He didn’t want to dwell but the slightest reminders kept setting him off. Arthur had noticed his low mood but hadn’t grasped the reason yet. Until the fateful night they watched Titanic and Merlin burst into tears as he watched Jack slide off the door and into the sea.

“Oh Merlin,” Arthur said, his own voice a little thick. “This bit always gets me too. But Jack and Rose have a love for the ages, they’ll never truly be parted.”

He placed a comforting hand on Merlin’s shoulder.

“Let it all out.”

And Merlin did, in one big wail.

“I’m so jealous that Jack gets to be in the ocean and I d-o-o-o-n’t.”

“Jealous?” Arthur said, in a voice that suggested he’d rather been pulled up short.

“I want to be pushed off a door into the sea!”

“Ah. Alright, okay, I see. There, there.”

Arthur rather awkwardly opened his arms and Merlin flung himself in between them.

“I miss the sea,” he sniffled into Arthur’s chest, and Arthur began to rub his back in soothing circles.

“I know. I’m sorry. I know.”

Arthur ended up carrying Merlin to bed that night (which he did with impressive ease, Merlin noticed, considering his much inferior strength), and made him his favourite breakfast in the morning (Coco Pops and kippers). But still Merlin couldn’t seem to shake his funk, drifting about the flat and the aquarium like a ghost, brooding on what he’d lost. He had no idea how he was supposed to survive a lifetime without the water.

“You’re banished from the sea too, technically,” Merlin reminded Arthur one evening. “They’d send someone else to kill you if they ever saw you again. Don’t you miss it?”

Arthur shrugged.

“I never liked the sea much anyway, to be honest. I was always nervous swimming after… after what happened to my mother.”

He fixed a keen eye on Merlin.

“I’m sorry, Merlin, This is all my fault. If I hadn’t gone looking for you all…”

“Yes, it is your fault,” Merlin readily agreed, and then felt bad when Arthur’s face fell. “Oh, it’s alright. I could have just killed you like I should have, I was the one who chickened out.”

“That’s comforting,” Arthur said dryly. “I am sorry, though.”

He set his jaw a little.

“I’ll make it up to you. Somehow.”

Merlin just waved a hand at him. There really wasn’t anything Arthur could do to ease this particular ache.

Then on Saturday morning Merlin was woken without ceremony at seven in the morning and told to get dressed.

“I’m not going to your yoga class Arthur, I already know how to put my legs behind my head, look-”

“Stop that!” Arthur said, face predictably reddening. “At least you’re wearing underwear this time… and it’s not yoga. We’re going on holiday.”

“Holiday?” Merlin said, bringing his legs back down. “Where to?”

“It’s a secret!” Arthur said triumphantly. “Get dressed, I’ve already packed for you, we’ll have breakfast on the road.”

“How long is this holiday? I’ve got work on Monday-”

“I asked Gwen to cover your shift!”

Arthur was positively glowing and Merlin decided he didn’t have the energy to argue. He only had plans to mope around the flat all weekend anyway. He doubted a trip away would bring him out of his funk but Arthur would have to find that out for himself.

Still, he didn’t want to give in too easily...

“What kind of breakfast?” he said, narrowing his eyes.

“Fishcakes from Alice’s,” Arthur said smugly.

Damn. The human really knew him.

“I suppose I could come along for the ride,” Merlin said sniffily.

“Attaboy. I’m picking the driving music!”

Despite being subjected to the endless warbling of Arthur’s favourite bands, the drive to - well, wherever they were going - was actually quite pleasant. The sun was shining, the scenery was beautiful, and Arthur even let him have the majority of the fishcakes.

The day improved further when they passed a seemingly endless stretch of fields dotted with adorable little creatures.

“Look! Look!”

Merlin had seen sheep before once or twice, but never these tiny versions. They looked like clouds with legs!

“Little sheep!” he said delightedly and Arthur laughed.

“ _Baby_ sheep. They’re called lambs.”

“Lambs,” Merlin said, trying the sound out. “I like that. How’s it spelt?”

Arthur’s mouth twisted a little.

“You’re not going to like it.”

“Oh, is it two ‘m’s instead of one?” Merlin said, fishing out his notebook. “I suppose that’s not too ridiculous.”

“Er no, it’s l - a - m. Er, b.”

“B?!”

By the time Merlin had finished bemoaning the continued ridiculousness of the English language, they were almost there. At least according to Arthur. He had an unfair advantage in that Merlin still struggled with reading road signs, especially when they whizzed by so fast. He was none the wiser when they pulled up by a cottage in a small village of no more than twenty houses and a quaint little pub.

“Where are we?” he said as they got out of the car and Arthur turned to him with a smile.

“The Lake District,” he said simply.

Merlin frowned, trying to think if he’d heard of it before.

“I used to come here with my mum when I was little,” Arthur said. “It was our favourite holiday destination. And I think you’re going to like it too.”

Merlin didn’t want to be rude but he wasn’t sure why. The village was pretty, but it wasn’t any prettier than countless similar villages near Chaxley.

Arthur grinned.

“It’s in the name, Merlin. The Lake District.”

“Oh right, because I like water?” Merlin said vaguely. There was a lake in Chaxley too, with little ducks in it, you could paddle in it about up to your shins. Perhaps Arthur thought paddling therapy was the cure to Merlin’s funk.

“The biggest lake here is 67m deep and about 1 and a half km wide,” Arthur said and Merlin’s mouth dropped open. “And not a single one connects to the sea. You can swim to your heart’s content here.”

“I… I can swim? In the open?”

Merlin’s heart skipped a beat.

“In any lake you like. Well, actually, Windermere’s the biggest so I thought we’d start there, then Ullswater’s a bit further to drive but it’s definitely worth seeing, oh and my personal favourite is Rydal Water so we should-”

Arthur was abruptly cut off by Merlin throwing his arms around him.

“Thank you so much,” he whispered into Arthur’s hair, a distinct lump in his throat. Had Arthur known how much he longed to swim in the open air again? To spread out and feel the cold water on his limbs, to dive down into the darkness?

Arthur was a good human, that was for sure. He could have been stuck with a lot worse than him.

He released Arthur who coughed embarrassedly.

“Yes, well. Just an idea I had. No big deal.”

Merlin gave him a huge smile.

“Yes it is,” he said and Arthur smiled back.

A three day weekend spent swimming into the wee hours went a long way to restoring Merlin’s good humour. And he wangled a promise out of Arthur on their last afternoon that they would make regular return visits.

“Of course, although I need to take you to the lochs of Scotland at some point-”

“L-o-c-k-s?”

“No, sorry, l-o-c-h-s.”

“Damnit!”

“Anyway, they’re even bigger and colder, you’ll love them. I just took you here first because… well.”

“Because you used to come here?” Merlin guessed.

“Yes. With my mother.”

Arthur’s mouth thinned a little and Merlin carefully reached out to pat his arm, as Gwen did to him at work sometimes when he was feeling low.

“You miss her.”

“All the time,” Arthur said, looking out over the shore. He picked up a stone, smoothed his fingers over the top. “I wish she’d got to know me as an adult.”

They were silent a few moments and then Arthur skimmed the stone into the water.

“Do you miss your parents?” he said suddenly.

Merlin shrugged.

“Haven’t seen them in eight years.”

“Oh I’m sorry,” Arthur said quickly, “are they-”

“No, not dead. Mated pairs just tend to move on to another colony when their offspring are grown up.”

It was normal to Merlin. He thought of his parents fondly, even if the likelihood was he might only see them a handful of times again in his life. But clearly humans had a different connection to their progenitors. He wasn’t the expert on human emotions but it seemed like Arthur carried a lot of pain from his mother’s death.

And his father’s disownment, most likely, even if he pretended not to. At least that Merlin could relate to. He missed his kin fiercely.

He put his hand back on Arthur’s arm and attempted a sort of rubbing motion. It was clumsy at best but somehow worth it when Arthur leaned into the touch.

After the holiday, something seemed to change between them. There was no more talk of moving out, even though Merlin could probably have put together a deposit from his wages by now. Arthur went on a mysterious website called Gumtree and found a single bed selling for cheap a few streets away. They both went to pick it up, though Arthur had to remind Merlin not to lift it with so much ease and pretend it was a two man job. It fitted perfectly in Merlin’s room and he celebrated by buying a nice new colourful duvet cover.

(“A Spiderman duvet, really Merlin?”

“Listen, I don’t know who this Spideryman is but I enjoy his funky outfit, okay?”)

Merlin had to admit that he’d never expected to like a human so much. Arthur made him laugh, his stories were interesting, and he mostly tolerated Merlin hogging the remote control. He did tend to blush a lot when Merlin was around but Gwen at work blushed semi-constantly so perhaps that was just a human trait. Merlin had begun to look forward to the evenings they spent together, when they were both off shift and could eat dinner and watch a film, or simply sit on the couch and chat away about nothing.

It was one of those evenings when Arthur produced a rather nice bottle of vodka and suggested they get rip roaring drunk.

“It’s been a long week and I’m on the evening shift tomorrow, what do you say?”

Merlin was always more than willing to take a drink - alcohol was a pleasure that life on land had surprised him with - and he readily assented. Two hours later and they were laughing about nothing, Arthur doing impressions of his uptight manager and Merlin imitating Cenred’s sneaky way of creeping up on people.

“Ugh, just one more drink and then I should go to bed,” Arthur said eventually. “I don’t start till six but we’ve got a big party booked in, I’m bound to be home late tomorrow.”

“Should I put a sock on the door?” Merlin said and Arthur looked baffled.

“Eh?”

“Did I say that wrong?” Merlin asked. “I was watching this American film and one man said he’d be home late and the other one asked that.”

“Ah. Right. And what did you take that to mean?” Arthur said, with the same tone he’d used when they were doing their reading lessons.

“Er, it’s a tradition? Like pumpkins at Halloween?”

Merlin had been rather delighted to hear about that one. Halloween sounded like an excellent excuse to demand sweets from people, though Arthur kept heavily implying Merlin was past the age for trick and treating.

“Sort of. It’s… well, when people have roommates, they might put a sock on the door or something similar to indicate they need privacy.”

“Privacy for what?”

“For…”

Arthur appeared a little lost, his cheeks pinkening.

“For being naked?” Merlin said helpfully, since Arthur had been so hung up on him doing that in common spaces.

“Well, yes,” Arthur said slowly. “But not just… for example, there might be someone else with them too. Also… naked. If you see what I mean.”

Arthur was blushing wildly now.

“Oh you mean _vreet_?” Merlin said, suddenly catching on.

“Vreet?”

“Yeah. Sex, you lot call it.”

“Well, yes. Exactly.”

“I get it!” Merlin said excitedly. “So if you wanted to have sex, you’d put a sock on your door so I’d know not to come in?”

Merlin didn’t know it was possible for a person to be any redder than Arthur was.

“I suppose,” he mumbled. “Should I get some more ice?”

He got up without an answer, making his way swiftly to the freezer.

“So why do you never do that?” Merlin asked curiously. “Have someone over for sex?”

Arthur appeared to be trying to climb inside the freezer.

“This ice is all stuck together,” he said in a somewhat strangled voice.

“I wouldn’t mind, I could just go out for a walk!”

“I think it needs defrosting.”

“Honestly, you can just let me know anytime and I’ll-”

“Merlin! For God’s sakes!”

Arthur slammed the freezer door shut.

“I don’t want to have anyone over for sex because I don’t want to have sex with anyone except for-”

He snapped his mouth shut abruptly.

“Except for?” Merlin prompted.

“Will you leave it!” Arthur exploded.

Merlin was silent for a few moments, but silence wasn’t really his forte.

“Is it Gwen?” he said at last.

Arthur massaged his temples.

“No, it is not Gwen,” he said very slowly. “In fact, Merlin, I’m gay.”

“Gay?”

“It means I’m only attracted to men,” he said, looking rather intently at Merlin.

“Oh” Merlin said curiously. “We don’t have that in my community.”

Arthur blinked a few times.

“You don’t?”

“No,” Merlin said. “It’s just not a thing. Could you pass me that ice?”

Arthur dropped it in his glass and then sat back down, looking rather sad for some reason.

“Well, there you go,” he said, more to himself than to Merlin.

Merlin took a long pull of his drink. Who knew that vodka and cranberry juice could be so refreshing!

“Yeah, well our concept of sexuality or whatever is a bit different,” he said casually.

“I suppose so,” Arthur said, in an odd, quiet voice.

“So everyone is attracted to everyone, no one limits themselves by gender or whatever,” Merlin continued. “Do we have any Pringles left?”

“Wait, so you’re saying that mermen are attracted to mermen? And also to merwomen?” Arthur said, suddenly looking more animated.

“Yeah and to pazni folk. Uh, pazni’s like…?”

“Trans?”

“Yeah! Basically.”

“So you’ve, erm, had vreet with…?”

“Mostly with Mordred but I used to with Freya a lot when I was younger. And once with Kara but that was an epic mistake.”

“Right,” Arthur said. “And, er, were you still involved with Mordred when you were banished?”

“Nah, we’d been over a while. He wasn’t what I was looking for.”

Arthur put down his glass.

“What are you looking for?”

“I don’t know,” Merlin said musingly. “Someone who makes me laugh. Someone interesting. Someone easy to talk to.”

Arthur twisted his hands together.

“Listen, Merlin...."

"Yeah?"

"I’ve been meaning to talk to you for a while," Arthur said, looking very serious. "I’ve been wanting to tell you that I… this isn’t easy to say-”

A sudden blare of music rang out.

“Is that your phone?”

“Yes,” Arthur said, teeth gritted. “Damnit, it’s work. I have to-”

He picked up the phone and said a series of terse yeses into it before hanging up.

“Great, they want me in at eleven tomorrow instead.”

“Then you need to get off to bed!” Merlin said. “Shoo, off you go, I’ll take care of the dishes.”

“But I want to tell you-”

“It can wait till tomorrow! You know what you’re like with no sleep.”

Arthur let out a rather heavy sigh but he didn’t protest further, just gave Merlin a rather lingering look on his way out. It was a look that Merlin couldn’t quite decipher, and it stayed with him. So much so that the next day he found himself telling Gwen about the whole conversation on their lunch break.

“I felt like I was missing something! And you know I’m not that good at reading emotions because I’m not hu- er, because I’m not an emotional person.”

Gwen gave him a sympathetic smile.

“You’re really not good at reading emotions, are you?”

“What do you mean?”

“Merlin, hon, in the three months I’ve known you, I’ve heard from you how Arthur let you move in when your old roommates chucked you out, how he paid for everything until you found a job, how he took you on holiday just because he saw you were blue, and now you’re telling me that last night he came out as gay and then said he had something he’d been meaning to tell you?”

Merlin looked at her in horror.

“You think he wants me to move out?”

Gwen burst out laughing, which was most unkind.

“Gwen!”

“I’m sorry Merlin, but can you really not see what’s going on here? He likes you.”

“Well, yeah, we get on well-”

“No, hon. He _really_ likes you. As in, romantically.”

_Oh._

Merlin was speechless for a few moments, a condition he didn’t often find himself in.

“What do I do?” he said eventually.

“Well, do you like him back?”

Merlin thought of Arthur making him tea in the mornings, painstakingly writing out the alphabet with him, bringing home fish from Alice’s as a treat on payday…

“Yes,” he said, suddenly overwhelmed. “Yes, I like him back.”

Gwen laughed again, this time in delight.

“Then you better let him know!”

“Yes. Yes!”

Suddenly Merlin didn’t want to do anything else.

“Can I borrow your phone to call him?”

“Merlin! This is an in person conversation. You should cook him dinner tonight and- oh, you’re on lock-up here aren’t you?”

“Yes but he’s working late too! I’ll be home before him.”

Gwen clapped gleefully.

“Perfect! Make him dinner, confess your love, and then come in tomorrow and tell me all about it.”

Merlin could barely summon the wherewithal to reply. His heart was racing. How could he have been so oblivious to the truth?

But he knew now and it felt like a great bubble of happiness had swelled up inside him. It lasted all afternoon, he couldn’t stop grinning as he went about his work, thinking of tonight and what he’d say and how Arthur would react.

He almost skipped the dip in the tank after he’d locked up, but then he felt like a quick swim might calm him down. He was so eager to get in and out that he forgot to pull the blinds down on the door but once he was swimming, he decided it didn’t matter. He’d only spend a few minutes here and then it was off to the shops. He needed to get the perfect ingredients if he was going to make Arthur the dinner he deserved…

Perhaps if Merlin hadn’t been so distracted he would have seen the eyes at the window, heard the soft creak of the door opening. But as it was, he didn’t notice anything until he’d climbed out of the tank and reached for his clothes, only to find them gone.

“Well, well, well,” Cenred's voice came from behind him.

Then there was a blow to his head and all was darkness.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your patience in these strange times! I hope you like the conclusion to this fishy tale :)
> 
> Warnings for restraints, threats of violence, brief strangulation, non-graphically described electric shocks and a gun. It's not as dark as it sounds, I promise!

Merlin hadn’t liked Cenred from the first moment he’d met him.

Arthur said it wasn’t unusual to have a difficult boss.

“Best to just let them think they’re right and just get on with what you’re doing,” he advised when Merlin first complained about the way Cenred slimed around the aquarium, telling him and Gwen off for the most minor mistakes.

“But he’s not right!” Merlin said indignantly. “I’m right!”

Arthur laughed.

“I know, Merlin, but that’s just the way it is. You can survive a bad boss, I promise you.”

Arthur had turned out to be right. Cenred’s saving grace was that he was so lazy he rarely left his office more than once a day, so it turned out to be fairly easy to avoid interacting with him.

Until now.

It took Merlin a while to force his eyes open, his eyelids felt almost impossibly heavy, as if they were being held down. There was a ringing in his ears and it was only the persistent feeling that something was very wrong that finally shook him into consciousness.

He was still in the back room. He was lying on his back on the floor, and his hands and feet were tightly bound with what felt like wires of some kind. He was still naked but a piece of canvas cloth had been thrown somewhat carelessly over him, half covering his body.

He turned onto his side and saw Cenred sat a few metres away, a smile twisting his lips.

“You’re a merman,” Cenred said plainly.

Merlin snarled, trying to stand, to reach Cenred and attack him, but his bonds had no give and he couldn’t move. He struggled for a few seconds more but even his superior strength couldn’t break the wires around him. A voice in his head told him to slow down, to act strategically. If strength wasn’t the way out of this, perhaps cunning was.

Merlin let his face crumple in fear.

“Cenred, what are you… why am I tied up?”

“Because you’re a merman,” Cenred repeated.

“A merman? What are you even talking about?”

Merlin allowed a little confusion and righteous anger onto his face.

“Mermen don’t exist, Cenred! Just think about what you’re doing. You’ve hit an employee over the head and tied them up. This is insane!”

He took a deep exaggerated breath.

“Just… just untie me. We can forget this ever happened.”

Cenred’s face hadn’t changed, that same smile till tugging at his lips.

“Save the dramatics. I know full well what you are, I saw you in that tank as plain as day.”

He regarded Merlin.

“I knew there was something odd about you. But I never thought a merman would be stupid enough to take a job on land.”

“Cenred, I don’t know what you’re talking about-”

“But what to do with you, that’s the question. I’m no expert in the trade of things like you. Luckily I know someone who is.”

For the first time since he’d woken up, Merlin felt a sense of real fear. The ‘trade’ was the illegal sale and exhibition of merfolk, in private zoos or residences, kept like pets for the wealthy and amoral. If he was bought by a collector, he’d likely never see life outside of a tank again.

He made a renewed attack on his bindings but Cenred only laughed.

“He’ll be here soon. And then we’ll see just how much you’re worth.”

Merlin swallowed down his rising panic, trying to think. Arthur would notice when he didn’t come home. He’d come to the aquarium straight away, it would be the first place he’d go.

But it wasn’t like Cenred would let him in to look around.

Well, then, Arthur would call Gwen and she would confirm that Merlin had been on lock-up duty. Arthur knew how Merlin always took a swim when he was on lock-up - surely he’d be on alert considering how anxious he’d always been before about Merlin’s swims.

But Cenred might have already moved Merlin from the aquarium by then. He might have been taken anywhere. To another country even, where Arthur would never even think to look for him, let alone find him…

Merlin’s increasingly frantic thoughts were interrupted by the blare of Cenred’s phone. Cenred left the room immediately, and when he came back a minute later, he was not alone.

The new man entering was thickset and mean of aspect, a sneer already on his face as he approached Merlin.

“This is it? You sure, Cen?”

“Absolutely.”

The man frowned.

“He doesn't look like one.”

Without warning he stepped closer and grabbed the canvas cloth, pulling it away to reveal Merlin’s body.

Merlin hissed, reaching out with his bound feet to kick at the man, who jumped back.

“Looks human to me,” he said disgustedly.

“Yeah, Val, because he’s not in the water, you idiot. You know they can switch.”

Val shrugged.

“Prove it, then.”

Cenred came closer. He cast an eye around the room and then picked up a long wooden rod with a metal hook on the end.

“Change forms,” he said. “Or you won’t like what I do to you.”

He raised the rod and Merlin let instinct take over.

“Oh God, please help me!” He cried, turning his face to Val. “He’s gone mad, he’s saying all this crazy stuff about mermaids! You have to call the police!”

Val narrowed his eyes but he looked wrongfooted.

“Don’t listen to that rubbish,” Cenred scoffed.

“Please help me!” Merlin said again, amping up the terror in his voice.

“If he won’t change himself, I’ll beat it out of him,” Cenred said, raising the rod again, and Merlin tensed, preparing for the blow.

“Fucks sake Cenred, you could beat him black and blue, but if he’s human it won’t make no difference!”

Cenred lowered the rod angrily.

“So what do you want to do?”

Val’s eyes roamed the room.

“Put him in the water.”

He gestured towards the tank.

“Can that lid go down any lower? Put him in, fill it up to the brim, then put the lid down. No space for air - he’ll have to switch to be able to breathe.”

“Genius,” Cenred said, clapping him on the back.

“No, please, I’ll drown,” Merlin said desperately. “I’m human, I’ll drown!”

But they weren’t listening. Cenred went to adjust the tank and Merlin tugged on his bindings again. If they got him in the water he’d have to switch, or risk drowning in his human form… And then they’d know what he really was.

He couldn’t think past the ache in his head for a way out and already Val was approaching him, cutting the ties around his feet. Merlin kicked out but Val was ready for him, picking him up as if Merlin weighed hardly anything at all and slinging him over his shoulder.

He climbed the ladder to the tank as Merlin struggled as hard as possible - he was strong enough to make Val grunt in pain but the man’s grip was tight and he didn’t let go.

He was dropped in the tank without ceremony and instantly bobbed to the surface.

“Please, don’t put the lid down, I’ll drown, please!” he shouted. Val just tugged him close enough to cut the ties on his hands. Once free Merlin made a desperate attempt to jump out but the lid was already pushing down on him and he sank below the water.

It felt all wrong to be beneath the water in human form; his lungs instantly protesting at the lack of air, legs kicking him up to the surface on instinct. But there was no surface, only a mere half inch of air between water and lid; he pressed his mouth right up to it but could scarcely take in a single breath.

It was no use. Merlin dropped down, bubbles trailing from his mouth. He had less than two minutes before his human form would run out of air, he knew that. He didn’t have a plan in his head and he highly doubted anyone would be coming to his rescue in the next thirty seconds.

Val and Cenred’s distorted faces grinned through the glass at him.

It made him sick to give up. But he had no choice. Already his lungs were burning and he was beginning to feel light-headed. He’d have to do this and hope there’d be another chance to escape down the line.

Still, he waited until the last second in pointless hope before he switched. The cool water rushing through the gills on his tail, pushing breath back into his body, felt heavenly for a moment. Then the fear set in again.

“I told you!” Cenred was saying, his voice muffled through the tank.

“Fuck me,” Val said, staring in open awe at Merlin’s tail. “I’ve never seen one with a purple tail before.”

“You think Alvarr’ll be interested?”

“I know he will. He’s been on the lookout since his last one died.”

“Can you put the call in?”

“For a cut,” Val said and a round of bickering began. Merlin tuned them out. This Alvarr sounded like a collector, perhaps with a whole zoo of his own. Or maybe he just liked having the one mercreature around as a pet, to cosset and control.

The idea was horrifying beyond endurance. He’d be in captivity for the rest of his life.

A sudden rap to the glass startled him.

“Ever been to Switzerland, _Merlin_?” Cenred said, drawing out his name exaggeratedly. “I think you’ll like it there. Not that you’ll be seeing much of the scenery…”

He and Val laughed uproariously but Merlin didn’t react. Switzerland. That meant Alvarr would need to come over, see what he was getting, arrange transport by air or sea. He wouldn’t be going anywhere tonight, at least.

_Please miss me, Arthur._

_Please come find me._

It was three days before Alvarr arrived.

The waiting was the worst. Twice a day Cenred or Val would come in to drop some fish into the top of the tank. They had a small sliding opening to pour it through but the first time they tried it, Merlin managed to get his hand through and break Cenred’s finger before the man withdrew, howling in pain.

He couldn’t regret the damage he caused but it had consequences. After that Val produced a rod that generated a small electric current when it touched the water. It gave Merlin enough of a jarring shock that he didn’t have the wherewithal to attack them.

Being shocked was horrible but it was worse to hear the two of them talk, to speculate on where he was going and how Alvarr was going to treat him there. At least they weren’t around much in the day - Merlin presumed that Cenred was still keeping up appearances in the aquarium. He wondered how Cenred was keeping Gwen out of the back room, which was now locked at all times with the blind always drawn.

He didn’t have to wonder what Cenred had told Gwen about his absence. Cenred had already bragged to him that he’d staged a robbery; told Gwen and the other casual staff that Merlin had made off with the day’s takings and had probably skipped town.

It infuriated Merlin to think of Gwen believing the worst of him. He hoped she knew him well enough to know he’d never do that, but it wasn’t like there was any evidence to the contrary. He had just up and vanished, and why would Gwen’s mind automatically go to kidnapping of all things?

Once he thought he saw a pair of eyes that looked rather like Gwen’s peer under the window blind, but they were gone when he blinked. Wishful thinking. Gwen had no reason to doubt that he was gone for good.

Even more terrible, Cenred had spoken to Arthur.

“Your bloke came by today,” he’d said the morning after Merlin had been imprisoned.

Merlin had been studiously ignoring Cenred but that made him whirl round in his tank.

“Blond guy, posh type. Is he your boyfriend?”

Cenred leered at him but Merlin just stared back, trying to look as impassive as possible.

“Anyway, he was asking all sorts about you.”

Cenred put on a high voice.

“Where’s Merlin, he never came home last night, oh I’m so worried!”

Something in Merlin clenched at the thought of Arthur worrying - he was grateful and he was sad all at once.

Would Arthur forget him, if Merlin never got free? Would he move on, and think only occasionally about the brief time they shared their lives together?

“I told him you ran off with the money and that shut him up.”

Cenred grinned triumphantly.

“They all seem to believe that pretty quick, _Merlin_. Looks like everyone in your life knew there was something wrong about you, even if they couldn’t figure what.”

Merlin turned his back again, only this time it was with the irrational fear Cenred would see tears pricking at his eyes. Had Arthur really believed it? Would he think so badly of Merlin so readily?

_No_ , the logical side of him asserted. Arthur was clever, he would be somewhere planning right now, he wouldn’t just give up.

But even if he didn’t, what could he possibly do to free Merlin? Even if he did get in here, it was two on one with Val and Cenred and they were both capable of violence in a way Arthur wasn’t. He couldn’t bear it if Arthur got hurt on his account.

And wasn’t it funny, that he was ready to give up his life to keep a human safe? Six months ago, Merlin never could have imagined caring for a human this much. But things had changed and now all he wanted was Arthur to be happy and well.

Even if Merlin never got the chance to be beside him.

Merlin was so bored after three days of doing nothing but floating that he almost welcomed Alvarr’s arrival. Almost, because of course where he was headed was going to be so much worse.

He estimated it was mid afternoon when Cenred and Val came in, leading a new face behind them. He was curious in spite of himself, looking up from where he’d been lying at the bottom of the tank.

Alvarr was a tanned man with dirty blond hair and a slight squint. He was expensively dressed in a grey suit, designer sunglasses perched conspicuously on his head, shirt casually unbuttoned at the top.

Merlin hated the very sight of him.

He swam as far back in the tank as he could but there was no hiding. Alvarr quirked a smile.

“Are you shy, little merman?” He said in smooth, slightly accented English. “I do hope not, there are many people back home who are waiting to meet you.”

Merlin bared his teeth but Alvarr’s smile only grew.

“Spirited. That suits me fine, little merman. You can put on a show for the guests in my exhibit.”

So he was to be exhibited. Merlin felt cold all over. It was the worst nightmare of all his people, to be put on display like a freak of nature; to be stared at and discussed and laughed at.

He had to get out before then. Alvarr was much more likely to take him by boat to mainland Europe than by plane, the logistics were so much easier. He had to get overboard that boat, by hook or by crook. At this point, being discovered by Sophia and executed sounded like a much preferable option to the horrors Alvarr had in store.

Alvarr was still staring at him and Merlin turned his back, not wanting to give the man the satisfaction.

“Quite the temper on this one,” Alvarr remarked, sounding amused.

“He’ll give you good value for money,” Cenred said eagerly.

“I don’t doubt it. It’s been so long since I’ve broken one in… and I do enjoy a challenge.”

The pit in Merlin’s stomach grew.

“Well, gentlemen, let’s talk business. I’ll be a happy man if I can sail back tonight with my new pet on board.”

It was to be by boat. Merlin tried to keep calm and plot his next move. The sea was his element, after all. There had to be a way…

But two hours later when the men returned, he had nothing concrete. He’d just have to watch for an opportunity.

Val climbed the ladder to lift the lid from the tank.

“Come here,” he said and Merlin didn’t deign to respond, sinking further down in the water.

Val looked irritated.

“Pass me the hook.”

It was a long pole with a round loop on the end to fit around a person and drag them to the surface. It was also laughably easy for Merlin to evade.

“Fuck’s sake,” Val said after several minutes of Merlin swimming out of his reach. “I’m gonna use the rod.”

Merlin tensed as he picked up the electrified rod, wondering if he should just have let himself be caught. But no, he wouldn’t give in to these people. He wouldn’t make it easy for them.

The shock hurt all the same, jolting through his body, short-circuiting his brain for a second. When he came back to himself, the loop was around his waist and he was at the surface. Val didn’t pull him out yet but simply held him at the edge of the tank, his head above the water.

“Change to human form,” he directed.

Merlin spat in his face.

Val raised his fist in anger but Alvarr called out from below.

“No bruises! I don’t want him marked.”

Val looked murderous.

“Well, you get him to change then.”

Merlin felt a small sense of triumph. They couldn’t hurt him without Alvarr’s permission, and there was no way he was going to make it easy on them by changing voluntarily.

Cenred seemed to realise this and huffed loudly from the ground below..

“Look at me, Merlin.”

Merlin didn’t.

“Your blond friend.”

Merlin stiffened.

“He lives with you, doesn’t he, he said so.”

Cenred made a show of tapping something into his phone.

“Three Horton Road, that’s the address you gave for your payslips? That’s where he lives, correct?”

Merlin couldn’t help but meet Cenred’s gaze. The man smiled coldly at him, then turned his head.

“Val, do you want to pay him a visit? We have a little time before Alvarr needs to get the boat. You could take the fillet knife.”

Merlin’s heart skipped a beat.

“Does it work as well on humans as fish, I wonder?” Cenred mused. “I suppose human flesh is tougher, I imagine the whole thing could get messy. Perhaps you can take a few pictures so Merlin can see.”

“It’d be my pleasure,” Val said.

Merlin snarled, trying to free his arms from the loop so he could swing for Val, but the man just laughed.

“Change back. Or I’ll pay your little friend a visit.”

Merlin’s pulse was racing, he felt hot and cold all over. Arthur was strong, he could fight back, but Val was stronger. And he was vicious, in a way Arthur would never be. He enjoyed inflicting pain.

Merlin would never let someone like that anywhere near Arthur.

He changed forms, head bowed in defeat. It felt odd to be human again, his body ached from the recent shock; and a wave of exhaustion hit him, sudden and deep.

If he tried to escape now, would he be putting Arthur in danger?

He let Val haul him out of the water and carry him down the ladder. He made a half hearted struggle to get free at the bottom of the steps but Cenred was already there in front of him. He roughly began to dry Merlin with a towel while Val held him still, and all the while Alvarr watched on. Merlin had never had any shame about being naked in human form before but Alvarr’s eyes on him, assessing and proprietary, made him want to cover up for the first time ever.

When he was somewhat dry, Cenred forced a t-shirt over his head and some jogging bottoms on his legs, along with a pair of cheap white trainers.

“We’ll be going out the back way to Alvarr’s car, and then we’ll be driving to the harbour. If you make a sound, or draw attention to yourself in any way, I will send Val straight over to your little friend’s house, do you understand?”

Merlin curled his lip, refusing to answer until Val shoved his arms painfully up his back and he was forced to choke out a yes.

The walk from the back door to Alvarr’s car was barely twenty metres and yet Merlin hoped against hope that someone would see him, that Gwen or Arthur would be walking by and would come to his rescue.

But the car park was deserted in the evening dusk and he was shoved into the back of the car without anyone to see.

It was a ten minute drive to the harbour and Merlin’s mind was working desperately the whole way, trying to think of something. If he ran, would they go straight to Arthur’s? Could he get there first to warn him? Normally he’d trust his own strength and speed, but after three days of precious little food and regular shocks, he was feeling much weaker than usual.

And then it was too late. They reached the harbour and Merlin was pulled out onto the dock, where a little rented speed boat was waiting. He scanned around frantically for people to help but no one was looking their way, and Val’s hand was still casually holding his arm, ready to tighten his grip at any moment.

“Well, if you’d like to make the last transfer we can just leave you here-” Cenred started to say but Alvarr shook his head.

“No. You both come with us to my boat and help me get him on. I have sedatives there and a cage to keep him in. I want him outnumbered till then.”

Val snorted.

“Think you’ve over-estimating him a bit?”

“I do not,” Alvarr said coolly. “The merpeople are trickier and more devious than your average catch. Only a fool would not take precautions.”

And he opened his jacket to reveal a gun strapped to his side, causing Merlin’s heart to sink even further.

“We’ll come with you,” Cenred said quickly, as though the gun was a threat to him rather than to Merlin. Then again, perhaps Alvarr intended it as both.

Val walked him onto the boat, shoving him down into a seat on deck and sitting down uncomfortably close next to him. Cenred sat on his other side while Alvarr went to start the engine.

“Tie his hands,” Alvarr said, tossing a rope into the back. Val wrapped it round Merlin’s wrists with unnecessary tightness, grinning at his wince of pain.

The boat started. The shoreline receded. Merlin stared at the little town he had grown to like, where a man lived that he had grown to love.

It was almost dark now and the lights from the little beach houses twinkled at him. He had hated being human at first but now he’d give anything to be back in Arthur’s tiny house, bickering over dinner and settling down to whatever film was on television that night, tucked up together on the sofa. Feeling happy. Feeling complete.

Tears pricked his eyes and he closed them, not wanting his captors to see. It would almost be better to rebel now and face Alvarr’s gun, than be taken like this. At least shot, he would likely be thrown overboard. Returned to the sea to die, as was always intended.

But the survival instinct was too strong. They drew near to the big boat and Alvarr cut the engine. He shouted and a man appeared on deck, throwing down a pilot’s ladder for them to board.

“You go up first,” Alvarr said, nodding to Cenred. “Then Val will take him up and deliver him to my associate. After he’s safely stowed, we can arrange the final transfer of money.”

Cenred looked vaguely disgruntled but he stood, catching hold of the ladder and starting the ascent.

Val pulled Merlin to his feet and knuckled his fist through Merlin’s hair.

“Perhaps I’ll come see you in Switzerland some day,” he said in a low voice. “See what tricks you’ve learned by then.”

Merlin growled, stamping his foot down hard on Val’s. The man stepped back, unwillingly loosening his grip, and it was all that Merlin needed to make for the side of the boat in preparation to jump.

Only to be greeted with the barrel of Alvarr’s gun.

“Very spirited,” Alvarr said, shaking his head. “I think I’ll have to sedate you all the way home.”

Val grabbed him again and Merlin didn’t have the energy to fight anymore.

He turned to take one last look at Chaxley and the sea he’d been raised in

Only to see a boat in the distance. A boat that was fast approaching.

It was hard to make out details in the near-dark but it looked like… it almost looked like…

The same blond blur Merlin had watched from a distance so many months ago.

_Arthur._

And he wasn’t alone. There was a smaller figure next to him and the closer they got, the more he became convinced he could see Gwen’s curly hair blowing in the wind.

Val and Alvarr hadn’t noticed. They were looking up to where Cenred had reached the deck.

Merlin summoned up every reserve of strength he had left and dug his elbows hard into Val’s side.

Val grunted and Merlin pressed his advantage, snapping his head back to headbutt Val in the nose. Val let go, making an animalistic noise of pain and dropping to the deck.

Alvarr swung round, gun in hand, and it was at that moment he saw the boat.

“Who the fuck-”

“It’s his mate,” Cenred called from above. “And one of the aquarium staff.”

“Are they armed?” Alvarr shouted back, gun still trained on Merlin.

“Can’t see,” came the reply and Alvarr narrowed his eyes.

“Merlin!” Arthur shouted and Merlin tried to crane his neck to look.

“Let him go!”

That was definitely Gwen’s voice. They had come for him, his best and only human friends in the world. He felt adrenaline coursing through him, renewing him. He edged away from Val, still groaning on the floor, whilst keeping his eye on the gun.

The noise from the other’s boat’s engine was incredibly close, they could only be a few feet away. Arthur called his name again and Merlin risked a glance back at them.

“Are you alright?”

“I’m okay,” Merlin shouted back and Alvarr waved the gun.

“Shut up,” he said to Merlin, and then called out to Arthur.

“Leave now and you won’t get hurt.”

“People know we’re here!” Gwen shot back. “You can’t just kill us all!”

“People know you’re here rescuing a merman?” Alvarr sneered. “I highly doubt it.”

Merlin made a slight move and Alvarr levelled the gun at him.

“I will kill your friends,” he said steadily. “And you will be responsible. Get on the boat now and I will spare their lives.”

Merlin stood paralysed a moment. He was so close to rescue and yet… Arthur and Gwen didn’t have a gun. They’d been so brave to come for him but there was nothing they could do against Alvarr. If he didn’t comply, Alvarr would wound or kill them.

“Don’t listen to him!” Gwen said but Merlin had already made up his mind.

He nodded, making sure Alvarr saw. Alvarr kicked out at Val, rousing him somewhat.

“Get him on the ship,” he hissed.

Merlin turned as much as he was able. Arthur and Gwen’s worried faces swam into sight.

“Thank you for coming,” he said, voice thick. “I’ll never forget you.”

“Merlin, no,” Arthur shouted.

Val’s hand was back on his arm, and this time he didn’t falter as he pushed Merlin to the ladder. Merlin looked to see Alvarr’s gun pointed not in his direction but at Arthur and Gwen instead. The message was clear.

He began to climb the ladder.

The cries of his friends followed him all the way up and Merlin felt hollowed out and empty by the time he reached the deck. Cenred and Alvarr’s associate were waiting to grab him, and Val clambered up seconds later.

He watched as Alvarr lowered his gun, triumph written in his features

It was almost too painful to see his friend’s faces staring up at him as Alvarr started to ascend. They were guiding their boat closer as though they might follow but Alvarr pulled the ladder up the second he reached the top.

It was over.

“How are we supposed to get back to shore now?” Cenred was whining in the background.

“Come with us. Be my guest in Switzerland for a few days,” Alvarr said, bonhomie apparently restored. “You can help me break this one in.”

“I wouldn’t say no,” Val said and all three men laughed, as the boat engine juddered alive.

Merlin couldn’t bear it anymore. He squeezed his eyes shut. He couldn’t watch as Arthur became a figure in the distance. It hurt too much.

But his eyes shot open again when a huge crash rocked the boat.

Alvarr was nearly knocked off his feet. He ran wildly to the side of the boat, reaching for his gun, but even Merlin could see from here that Arthur and Gwen were still sitting in their boat, no firepower on hand.

“What the hell was-”

CRASH.

A sound like metal crunching and a huge jolt sent them all to the floor. Merlin took the opportunity to edge away from his captors; he didn’t know what was going on but he knew it could only be good for him.

CRASH.

Alvarr’s associate slammed hard into the side of the boat, knocked unconscious. Val and Cenred were trying to find their balance while Merlin grabbed a handle on the side to cling onto.

CRASH.

The ship lurched, almost as though it was about to capsize. But how could that be possible? What could be strong enough to wreck a whole boat from beneath?

_Unless…_

Merlin painstakingly heaved himself up with his bound hands to peer over the edge of the boat. The water was choppy, swirling below him, as if moved to a frenzy.

Then he saw a flash of a golden tail.

Merlin grasped the rail and began to haul himself over, ready to fall into waiting hands.

But someone grabbed his feet, pulling him back to deck.

“You’re not going anywhere!” Alvarr bellowed.

There was all at once a great rushing sound, like a thousand winds blowing through the waves, and then a voice rang out below, crystal clear.

“Let our brother go or we will tear you apart.”

Sophia’s hair was shining even in the dark, her skin lit with a translucent glow.

“No!” Alvarr screamed out. “He’s mine! He’s mine!”

“Give him back,” Sophia said, only this time it was her voice and Freya’s and Mordred’s and Kara’s and so many others, mingled together so that their cry filled the air.

“Never!” Alvarr howled.

CRASH.

The boat tipped to one side.

CRASH.

“Shoot them!” Cenred shouted but the gun was long gone, slipped from Alvarr’s hand and over the edge.

“Do something!” Val cried but the wind whipped his voice away into the darkness as the merfolk below rocked the boat from side to side.

CRASH.

“You won’t have him if I can’t!”

Alvarr started towards Merlin, his manner deranged. Merlin kicked out desperately but the man climbed on top of him, hands wrapping around his throat, and Merlin couldn’t manoeuvre his own bound hands to push him off.

He tried to buck his hips but Alvarr was a deadweight upon him, all previous poise gone. His eyes were wild and blank of reason. He’d rather kill Merlin than let him go.

Merlin kept struggling but his air was running out. He let out a single cry and it was in his own language that he called out.

“ _Help me_!”

For a moment nothing happened and then the world tipped sideways. Merlin heard a rush in his ears and it took him a moment to realise he was falling. Alvarr’s hands came loose from his throat and suddenly the man was whipped away, out of his sight.

Then Merlin hit the water.

He changed forms in an instant, tail uncurling beneath him. He still felt weaker than he’d ever been but as a merman he had strength enough to break the ropes around him. The cheap clothes he had been put in fell off in tatters and the cool water soothed his limbs. He took one long dive down to savour the feeling and then split the surface.

The ruins of Alvarr’s ship lay all around. It had been torn almost in two. There was no sign of any of the men who had been aboard and Merlin knew there never would be again.

He turned, suddenly panicked, scanning the area until he saw Arthur and Gwen’s boat floating a few feet away.

He couldn’t see them and his stomach lurched. He swam to the boat’s side within seconds, pulling himself up on one side to look in and see…

Arthur and Gwen huddled together, drenched and dishevelled and blissfully unharmed.

“Merlin!”

Arthur leapt up, throwing his arms around Merlin, ignoring the handrail between them.

“You’re okay! Are you okay?”

“I’m fine, I’m fine,” Merlin said, laughing and crying all at once, letting Arthur fuss over him.

“We were so worried,” Gwen cried out, jumping up to attempt an awkward hug of her own. “And then we got out here and that man had a gun and I thought we’d be too late...”

“You weren’t,” Merlin said sincerely, affection swelling up inside him.

“Merlin,” came a voice from behind him.

Gwen gasped and Merlin turned to see Sophia rising from the water. Then Freya popped up and Mordred and all the others; his beautiful shining family casting a dim glow across the black waves.

“Your highness,” Merlin said, touching his chest in the traditional greeting.

“I think we’re past formalities tonight,” Sophia said. “Are you hurt?”

“No,” Merlin said honestly. “Just weak.”

“It is well. You were lucky”

“Thank you for…” Merlin could barely finish his sentence. He had been banished and yet they had still come in his hour of need.

“Don’t give us all your thanks,” Sophia said, sounding amused. “The human was the one who told us of your plight.”

It took Merlin one second to realise Sophia had spoken in English and another second to process what she’d said.

He swung back round to Arthur, who smiled nervously.

“I did, yes, er, your highness. Majesty.”

“You called on them?” Merlin said, completely - what was that funny word Arthur had taught him? - _flabbergasted_.

“Yes, we were quite divided on whether it was the bravest or most foolish thing we had ever seen,” Sophia said grandly. “The balance tipped just slightly towards brave and we agreed to help.”

She levelled Merlin with a stare.

“You may have betrayed us, brother, but we would not see one of our own sold into the wicked trade.”

“Thank you,” Merlin said, meaning it.

“Also we took another vote!” Freya burst out and Sophia glared at her. She made an apologetic gesture and Sophia rolled her eyes.

“The human told us why he sought us before. We trust he will not be a nuisance to us again now that he has the answers he needs. Therefore, he is permitted within the ocean once more.”

Sophia favoured Merlin with a rare smile.

“And you may rejoin us. If you so wish.”

Yet again, Merlin was too stunned to speak.

“C-come back?” he stammered.

“I trust that your recent experience with humans has impressed upon you why we must keep our lifestyles secret and sacred. I think the lesson was hard won enough. Your banishment is lifted.”

“I can come home?”

Merlin thought of swimming in the depths of the ocean again. Floating on the current, watching the sun flicker above the surface, bathing in its warmth. Being with his friends again, his kin, his people. Home at last.

Then he caught a glimpse of Arthur beside him. Arthur who was smiling so bravely, but whose eyes looked so sad. Arthur who’d taken him in and taught him things and made him laugh when things seemed hopeless.

Arthur who he loved.

“I can’t,” he said softly.

Sophia arched her eyebrow.

“Excuse me?”

“I…”

Merlin looked at Arthur and then back at his family.

“I.. I hated being human at first. And living on land. And not being able to swim and- but I met Arthur.”

He heard a slight intake of breath from behind him but he kept his eyes on Sophia.

“And he befriended me and took care of me and I think… I think it might be _hesyn_.”

Hesyn was the closest translation his own language had for love, though it encompassed even more than the human concept. It had something of the eternal in it - long term companionship, a commitment to see life through together.

“I think I want to stay with him.”

Sophia’s face was expressionless. She was quick tempered, Merlin knew, and the last thing he wanted was to incur her wrath. But he couldn’t deny how he felt.

All he’d wanted for so many months was to go back home to the sea. But he’d found a different kind of home with Arthur, and he didn’t want to give up on it.

“This is most irregular,” she said at last, her tone flat.

“You did say I could rejoin you ‘if I wish’,” Merlin said, somewhat cheekily.

Sophia’s nostrils flared.

“Always on the lookout for a technicality, brother,” she said icily. “But… if it is truly _hesyn_ …”

Merlin didn’t need Freya’s enthusiastic grin to know his luck was in.

“Than you’d better stay,” Sophia finished.

Merlin couldn’t help the smile that split his face.

“Thank you, your highness.”

“Yes, well, your banishment from the sea is lifted but don’t think you can come swimming back to us if this doesn’t work out,” Sophia grumbled. “An offer like this is once in a lifetime.”

“I understand,” Merlin said, nodding.

It was a permanent decision he was making but he didn’t feel afraid. He knew down to his fins that it was the right one.

“As for you,” Sophia suddenly said, raising her hand to point at Gwen.

“Me, your highness?” Gwen squeaked, looking alarmed.

“How do we know you won’t tell others of our existence?”

“Oh gosh, I would never, I promise! I mean, Arthur said you were endangered and that nasty people try to catch you and steal you, and I would never want to help those people! And I’m very good at keeping secrets, everyone says so, and I like Merlin ever so much, ma’am, so I wouldn’t want to jeopardise our-”

“Yes, alright,” Sophia said, massaging her head with one hand. She cast a stern look at Merlin.

“As her friend, I hold you responsible for her. Your banishment can always be reinstated.”

“She won’t tell,” Merlin assured her. He hadn’t known Gwen long but he was sure she was someone to be trusted.

“Very well, we accept your promise, Gwen. And if you break it, we will kill you,” Sophia added rather casually.

Gwen gulped and managed to make some sort of half-curtsy.

“Our business is concluded,” Sophia said, her tail flipping up behind her. “Live well, Merlin.”

“And you,” Merlin said solemnly.

Sophia gave one last regal nod and then dropped beneath the waves. Freya and Mordred and the rest followed with cries of “bye Merlin!” and “don’t forget us!” until the surface was calm and unrippled again.

Merlin swallowed the lump in his throat and turned back to face his friends. Arthur was looking at him with so much hope and wonder that it almost made Merlin want to look away.

“You’re staying with us?”

Merlin shrugged.

“Who else is gonna lift the fridge when you need to clean it?”

For a moment they just looked at each other and then Gwen tapped Merlin’s arm.

“We should probably go, they’ll already be sending people to find out what all the noise was.”

Merlin changed forms quickly and hauled himself up onto the boat. He gave Arthur a full bodied embrace, both of them clinging tight, then he hugged Gwen too.

“Oh… I mean, this is lovely Merlin, but you are naked.”

“You get used to it,” Arthur said, passing over a hoodie.

Gwen and Arthur’s side of the story came out in bits and pieces on the ride back to shore.

“I knew something was wrong when you didn’t come home that night.”

“And I knew something was wrong when you weren’t in work the next day. And Cenred told me that ludicrous story about you making off with the till - none of us believed it, Merlin. So I called Arthur.”

“And - well I couldn’t tell her you were a merman of course, but I did ask if she could try and check the back room. Then she told me it was suddenly off limits so that made me suspicious.”

“He said he was going to come down again and look around but I told him Cenred would only call the police on him, and it was much safer if I did it. Then on the second day you were missing, I saw the blinds were rucked up a little so I peeked in and…”

Gwen trailed off, seemingly unable to articulate the shock of seeing her friend with an unexpected tail.

“I saw you!” Merlin said excitedly. “I thought I’d imagined it!”

“It was me!” Gwen said gleefully. “And I rang Arthur right away! Okay, no, well I actually had to go and sit down for a bit, but I called Arthur right after.”

“Was it a lot to take in?”

“Well, it was, but my brother Elyan used to work on the fishing trawlers when he was younger and he always claimed he saw people in the water. I actually need to call him and apologise for all the times I laughed at him.”

Gwen made a guilty face.

“Anyway, she called me and I basically had to admit you were a merman,” Arthur said, “which required a bit of explanation. But once we knew where you were, we could plan. Gwen figured out pretty early that you were guarded all day so I staked out the car park, so we could be there when you were moved. We were round the corner when they took you today and Gwen drove as fast as she could but you were already on the water when we arrived.”

“So this is your boat, Gwen?” Merlin said, rapping the side with his knuckles.

“Er,” Gwen said, and he could dimly make out her face flushing in the darkness. “We may have borrowed it.”

“Nice,” Merlin said, entirely unconcerned, and Arthur groaned.

“Merlin’s still learning a bit about human morality.”

“Eh? You needed a boat and you got a boat, how could that be immoral?” Merlin said, baffled.

“Anyway, that’s how we got here.”

“I think you missed a bit,” Merlin said, raising his eyebrow at Arthur, who had the grace to blush. “What were you thinking, contacting Sophia? She could have killed you.”

“I knew we’d need help,” Arthur argued. “And I knew she wouldn’t take kindly to one of her own being sold into the trade.”

“How did you even-”

“I took a rowboat out late at night and swam to where I first saw you. Then I sort of… called her name for a bit.”

Merlin couldn’t help but let out a snort.

“Yes, well, no one answered,” Arthur said huffily. “Then I tried Freya and no one came, and the only other name I could remember was Kara and she literally popped up within seconds.”

“Did she try to kill you?” Merlin said, fully aware of the answer already.

“Yes, immediately,” Arthur admitted, “but I managed to persuade her to get Sophia by telling her you’d been kidnapped. And then we talked and… and I told her about my mum and stuff. And then she said they’d be ready if you were transported by sea.”

“But we still couldn’t be sure tonight!” Gwen burst in. “When they took you up that ladder, we were so scared. We thought no one was coming and we’d just have to watch you sail away and-”

She broke off, sounding choked up, and Merlin put his arm around her.

“Thank you,” he said. “Both of you. Thank you so much. I can never repay you.”

Gwen snuggled into his side.

“What are friends for?”

They docked quietly in the spot they’d taken the boat from, and there didn’t seem to be any angry owners around who’d noticed its absence. Across the bay, they could see ships sailing towards the wreckage and they hurried away from the harbour before anyone could ask them any questions.

Two streets into town, Gwen turned off to find her car, giving Merlin a bone cracking hug goodbye.

“Take a week off,” she said merrily. “Then get back to work as my new assistant manager!”

It wasn’t far to Arthur’s house from there but Merlin was exhausted from all that had happened. It was a warm night but he was only wearing Arthur’s hoodie - which thankfully was big enough on him that it prevented any indecent exposure - and he was shivering slightly. He was still unsteady on his feet too and Arthur seemed to notice both of these things simultaneously, wrapping his arm around Merlin to support him. It felt warm and nice and Merlin leaned into the touch.

“Are you really alright?” Arthur said quietly.

Merlin gave the question some thought.

“I’m more vulnerable as a human,” he said at last. “I think the last few days have shown me that. I suppose that’s a bit… scary.”

“But you don’t regret-”

“No,” Merlin said firmly. “I’ve made my choice.”

If vulnerability was the price to pay, then he would learn how to pay it. The more you risked, the more you stood to gain. That was how he understood it now.

“And they didn’t hurt you?”

Merlin was about to brush the question off but something in Arthur’s voice made him want to be honest. He told him about the electric shocks and the threats and Arthur went very stiff and still and then tightened his grip around Merlin to the point where he was almost lifting him off the ground.

“Steady on,” Merlin squawked, when it felt like he was about to end up in a fireman’s carry.

“Sorry, sorry,” Arthur said, loosening his grip. “I’m just… I hate them for what they did.”

“Well, they’re all six leagues under now so no harm done,” Merlin said cheerily. Which possibly wasn’t the most human reaction to death but there was still a lot of merman in him after all.

Arthur didn’t seem inclined to disagree, rubbing Merlin’s arm in slow, soothing circles.

When they finally got back Arthur bossily sent him upstairs to shower and change while he made dinner. By the time Merlin came down again, all clean and cosy in his kimono, Arthur was waiting with a sea bream dinner and extra helpings of scampi fries.

It tasted like the best food he’d ever eaten. Merlin sank into the sofa once he was done, wiggling his feet with joy, so glad and grateful to be back home safe and sound.

Arthur cleared the dishes and came to sit beside him, pressing a cup of sweet tea into his hands.

“We need to build your strength up,” he said solicitously.

“So lots of fishcakes?” Merlin said hopefully.

“If you insist.”

“I bet you saved a lot on fish while I was away.”

“Oh, millions. I’m buying myself a speedboat.”

“Why bother, when Gwen can just steal you one?”

Arthur snickered.

“I should impress on you how wrong it is to steal, but Gwen really was awesome in that moment. She just jumped in and kickstarted the engine like it wasn’t even a thing.”

“She’s amazing.”

“Yes, I don’t know what I’d have done without her.”

Arthur nudged him, and the gesture was so homely and natural that Merlin’s heart soared.

“Drink your tea before it’s cold.”

Merlin just grinned at him, happily dazed.

“It’s good to be home.”

Arthur blinked and then suddenly there were tears falling down his cheeks. Merlin sat up in alarm, putting his tea down and reaching for Arthur.

“I’m sorry,” Arthur choked out, scrubbing at his face. “I was just so scared and I couldn't get to you and I thought I would lose you.”

“But you didn’t so don’t cry, idiot,” Merlin said, trying to sound comforting but just coming across blunt. Fortunately, it had the effect of making Arthur laugh.

“I’ve missed your way of speaking.”

“I've missed _you_ ,” Merlin said and threw caution to the wind, tugging Arthur onto his chest and wrapping his arms around him.

He let Arthur talk for a while, about he’d felt the last few days and what had gone through his head. Where he had searched for Merlin and what he was prepared to do to get him back.

Then Merlin told Arthur about waking up to Cenred and Val coming and the tank and the forced change. And how afraid he’d been of what was waiting for him in Switzerland and how much he’d longed to be home.

Then for a while they just lay there, Arthur in Merlin’s arms, listening to each other breathe.

Eventually, Arthur cleared his throat.

“What’s _hesyn_?”

_Ah._

Well, it wasn’t the revelation the way he’d planned - wooing Arthur with a home cooked dinner and a surprise love declaration - but the last few days had proved that there was no time like the present.

“Love,” Merlin said simply. “Long term, deep compatibility. The kind that lasts.”

He heard Arthur take in a shaky breath.

“You said to Sophia-”

Merlin didn’t even let him finish.

“Arthur,” he said clearly. “I love you.”

He sat up and Arthur sat up with him, staring at Merlin like he scarcely dared believe it.

“I didn’t realise it before last week. But once I knew, I knew. I was coming home to tell you and then Cenred happened. But I love you and that’s why I chose to stay on land with you.”

Arthur looked for a second like he might cry again but then the most beautiful smile broke across his face.

“Merlin, I love you too.”

“Yes, of course you do. Gwen told me,” Merlin said, because they didn’t need to state the obvious. Even if it was somewhat nice to hear.

Arthur laughed then, his lovely face all happy and shining, and Merlin closed the gap between them, their lips meeting.

He’d never kissed anyone on dry land before. It felt distinctly odd, but in a weirdly wonderful way. More natural than any other strange human thing he'd experienced so far.

They broke apart and Arthur’s eyes were very wide.

“This is a lot to take in,” he murmured. “I mean, will this change things?”

“Yes, obviously,” Merlin said, rolling his eyes. “I’ll move into your room, of course, but we’ll have to get some double sheets with the Spideryman on for your bed. And then… well actually, that’s the only change I can think of right now.”

“I suppose I can live with that,” Arthur said, eyes twinkling.

“We can put a sock on our door when we’re having sex,” Merlin said eagerly and Arthur laughed.

“Steady on. We’ve barely kissed yet.”

“Well, what are you waiting for?” Merlin said. And leaned back in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! And if you can't get enough of LFB's awesome prompt and wish you could read another take on it, you're in luck as the brilliant SlantedKnitting has written just that! Check it out [here](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/CamelotRemix2020/works/24278164), and please do give LFB's [original art](https://archiveofourown.org/works/18975604) all the love too <3


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